Death to us part now only means till the feelings go away. I learned when something goes wrong, it’s better to leave than to stay. I’ve learned to use my head more and my heart less but it only got me to become heartless. Love use to mean our hearts would pound fast and slow at the same time, now I just get scared because every boy uses the same line. No one asks for a simple first date or a deep conversation, because no one is looking for love anymore, just a quick penetration. But what about those remaining few, who still look for love but who ended up with the wrong dudes? All I ever wanted was a prince charming to my happily ever after, but I’m left with covering up the heartbreak with smiles and laughter. Love has become a pain enduring cycle, getting back at the person before you, through the person after. Because love has taught us, we don’t always get our way, no matter how hard we try, it’s never enough to make someone stay. But what if your the person who always leaves? How am I supposed to love, when the problem isn’t them, it’s me? My insecurities have always taught me to run before it’s to late. To end things if they begin to get serious after a couple of first dates. I’d rather not use my heart or fall in love, that’s not my plan. Love has taught me to act like a lady but think like a man. But what if you found someone who has made you change your views? He didn’t care whether you loved him, but rather if YOU loved you. He wasn’t worried about your bra size or the way your butt curved in your jeans. He loved you physically, mentally, emotionally, and by all means. He primarily cared about your self respect, rather than sex and moving on to the next. But what if you can’t just seem to fall in love? I ended things and he begins to lose hope. Because the one girl, he ever cared for just had to let go. I didn’t feel the love connection. I couldn’t fall in love no matter how hard I tried. I wanted to so badly, but he just wasn’t my forever guy. Love has worked in mysterious ways. I’ve never fallen in love but I know I will some day. As for now, I remember to love myself because if you don’t love you, how can you fall in love with someone else? But let’s suppose for a minute I was a boy and we traded roles? I was the one who gave it my all and all I ever found myself surrounded by were hoes. I wanted a girl with intelligence and grace. But all they ever care about is how sexy they are or if they have the perfect face. Now I can’t speak for a man, but I know where we go wrong ladies. Stop acting like those who have hurt you and put the bandaid on your heart yourself. If you got trust issues, fix them first before you push away someone else. Just don’t lose hope on love but don’t give up on your self worth. And ladies remember to treat your man like a king and men treat your ladies like their queens, because love will show you there is no greater feeling.
